28 An inspiring life begins… tHe FIRst HAlF so there you were. A reality which slowly entered our life. You didn’t make your presence known much, a little morning sickness was the only sign. hold on, there were other signs! Your daddy got in gear immediately: he drew plans for your bedroom, for the swing in the yard, surfed the web for day care and the best schools. He was already far off in the future, while I was still waiting incredulously to feel the first sign of you. “I need to do something too,” he was always saying. It was his way of getting used to the thought of the new addition, who still hadn’t given us any sign of his pres- ence. I was the one who was pregnant after all, with everything this entails: my appetite was as changeable as a teenager’s mood, and I was to finally need a bra cup size which was larger than a B. And before you knew it, I could no longer do up my favourite trousers, as if you wanted to tell me that you needed the space. In the morning, I’d stand in front of the mirror to see how my stomach was slowly getting rounder. mean- while, almost half the waiting time was over - just 20 weeks to go until your arrival. But then, one day, in bed in the morning, you tickled me for the first time. It was as if I had a butterfly in my belly. I called your daddy so loudly that he rushed out of the shower, dripping wet and anxious. every day from that day forth, he would tell you something or play you his favourites from his latest playlist. In the meantime, I’d become a regular at the doctor’s, who checked on you and then would nod happily, mumble “marvellous” and send me home with a “keep doing what you’re doing, see you in four weeks”. You were growing beautifully; everything was where it should be and had been for some time. Your fingers were so tiny, but one could still see there were five fingers on each hand. tIme FOR decIsIOns We had plenty to consider and organise. I had to talk to my boss and decide how long I wanted to be here just for you, how to organise my return to work and which tasks your daddy would take over. no easy decision. How was I supposed to know how things would be once you got here? my interests changed as if someone had thrown a switch. I still tried to go to small concerts and regularly get together with my non-pregnant friends. But where did this baby affinity suddenly come from? Is it that nesting hormone which is released during pregnancy? When I went shop- ping, I’d have to stop in front of anything with the size 0-3 months, miniature trainers almost made me lose it and I couldn’t get that wooden cradle at the designer boutique round the corner out of my head for weeks. And I didn’t even know yet whether you were a boy or a girl. “And before you knew it, I could no longer do up my favourite trousers, as if you wanted to tell me that you needed the space.”